Monday, May 25, 2015

Old Friend

Hi there old friend. What’s up? Let’s talk about the elephant in the room. Why have I been away you said? Let me get down to the nitty gritty. I didn’t feel like I was posting for myself anymore, honestly. I fed my hungry fears instead of my hungry dreams and we both know they are as hungry as their last meal. My fears got bigger while my dreams were tucked away in a dark cold corner. I started doubting and questioning myself — whether my friends thought it was a ridiculous idea to blog (and believe me there were “Judgey McJudgeson” looks that came my way) or if anyone was really reading this — the list goes on and I let it take over me. The thought of it was debilitating and posting anything was so dreadful that I kept avoiding it. I was afraid to be myself and be subjected to public scrutiny. It was a pattern that I couldn’t shake off. I played it off as not having enough time and when a couple of friends started asking me when I would blog again I kept saying soon. Months went by and I missed you. I know I wanted to keep going so I told myself just make a decision already and go with it. Whatever it is, I have to live with it. 

So I made a decision, I’m keeping you. I’m going to start blocking the outside noise and revive the good old dream. The huzz is really supportive and is even asking me to make a schedule so he can help out. I just came back from a trip and we took a few shots in Paradise. I hope you give me a chance, friend. I missed you.


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